Long Live Neighborhood Nip | A Legend Lost

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When the news broke of a shooting involving Nipsey Hussle, my mind did not allow me to think he was one of the victims. When I learned that he was indeed injured, I once again did not think of death. I figured I would go online later that evening and see he was recovering and all would be well in the end. As more tweets started rolling in saying he had passed, I shook my head and waited for a trusted source. After all, Twitter loves jumping to conclusions. Shortly after, I had mentions from a few of my Followers that NBC had broken the tragic news. He was dead at age 33. I was flabbergasted. “We’ve really lost another one?” was my first thought. People die everyday, we all know this, yet for some reason, the news of his death started to hang over me like a dark cloud. My spirit felt unsettled, and this confused me. I didn’t know this man. I was a casual fan, at best, so why was this bothering me so? It finally dawned on me that this tragedy is bigger than music. Yes, he was a musician, but he was so much more in addition: a father, a friend, a teacher, an entrepreneur and investor in his community. Nipsey Hussle used his platform to inspire and educate, yet he also walked the talk. People who are actually about that action seem few and far between these days. So many of us are content spewing our grandiose ideas of how we would change things in our environment or what others need to be doing to elicit change, yet Nipsey actually put his words into play. He was not content living in a community policed and owned by no one who actually inhabited the neighborhood, so what was his solution? Let’s buy these unwanted pieces of real estate and put our money back into OUR communities. Nipsey often spoke of how depreciating assets such as cars and jewelry are desirable but unimportant, and true value lies in investments in yourself and others, perseverance and a mindset of growth and abundance. A man of positivity was taken from us. A man who delivered a message that many Black youth in American could relate to was taken from us. Whether you believe the Dr. Sebi based conspiracies, want to blame “Black on Black” crime or gang violence, at the end of the day, we’ve lost another one. When will it stop?

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It is my belief that Black Americans are desperate for leadership. Yes, we have come a long way from segregation, but we still have a marathon to go when it comes to breaking down past and current barriers that prevent us from being on equal footing with White America. I am not sure if Nipsey Hussle ever deemed himself a leader or activist, but his message and community works were an important factor in our advancement. Black owned businesses are too few in this country, and through his Our Opportunity initiative, he endeavored to partner with other Black community leaders in different cities to create businesses that would be of service to the Black residents instead of forcing them out. This is when I begin to feel angry all over again. Our progress as a people moves so slowly because whenever someone steps up to the plate, senseless violence silences them. Here is a man who made it out, but who remained dedicated to uplifting those around him, a man who refused to forget about the little guy. Nipsey never made it to the meeting with the LAPD to discuss solutions to gang violence, and his other community based projects such as Destination Crenshaw are now hanging in the balance.


Despite his past of gang affiliations and activity, it would be an injustice to his legacy to deny the impact Nipsey Hussle left on his community and Black America in general. We need our Black fathers, husbands, and brothers, and everyday we lose too many to violence or the penal system. How many Black men committed to promoting change in their communities die everyday that we hear nothing about? The media sweeps it under the rug because it does not further their narrative that Black men are dangerous and to be feared. A son and daughter are now fatherless because someone driven by hate decided to play God one Sunday afternoon. As a Black woman, I am weary. These types of deaths are starting to feel too familiar. From Malcolm X and Dr. King, to Tupac, to the tragic killings of people I have known personally, I am tired of adding to the list. What is the solution? We cannot eradicate hate out of people’s hearts, we can’t eradicate weapons, and the American prison system is the most pathetic form of “rehabilitation” in history. How do we protect our Black men from society, and how do we protect them from US? At times, we are our own worst enemy. We cannot use the excuse that Eric Holder (the alleged shooter) is a product of his environment when his victim was raised in the same community, yet chose to elevate beyond a lifestyle of violence and discord. Nipsey’s death hit home for so many of us, and I took it personally. It is our responsibility to live out his vision, no matter how big or small your platform. Be a forward thinker, invest in your community and uplift those around you. We can’t let his death be in vain.

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You’re a Loyal Fool

Women are nurturers. Many of us love to fix broken things and heal what has been hurt and/or damaged. Whether it be by nature or nurture, we have the propensity to see past any trespasses made against us and see the good in people and to also help it manifest. Perhaps it’s due to the maternal qualities that reside in a lot of us and is further strengthened by how young girls are socialized to be caretakers. These are redeeming qualities, however, this mindset becomes toxic when some women interpret it as an obligation to tolerate disrespect, inconsistency, infidelity and a myriad of other problematic actions. Have women really become so thirsty for a man that any man will do? In some instances, I believe that is the case. For a lot of us, however, I believe it has been ingrained in our psyches that as long as he is providing some semblance of care, shut up and “let a man be a man.” Throughout countless generations and still in some cultures today, women have been forced to depend on men for survival. Women in Saudi Arabia were just given the right to drive, for goodness’ sake. American women did not begin working consistently until the 1940’s, so it was essential to secure a husband swiftly, otherwise end up destitute. Being an unmarried woman was not a good look, and many women were forced to marry ain’t sh*t men just to have a roof over their heads and some food on the table. Divorce was frowned upon just until relatively recently, so a lot of women just had to endure a bad situation. This created some “stand by your man” mentality that has trapped women in bad relationships for eons. giphy A lot of us watched our mothers and other women in our family tolerate treatment they did not deserve, masked under “he’s a good man, he just blah blah blah.” We love to make excuses in an attempt to justify the bad behavior from people we love, absolving them of any responsibility for their actions and sweeping all the issues under the rug. No matter your reason for staying with a man who doesn’t value you, you’re doing yourself a disservice. It will never be worth it. You’re holding yourself hostage for what? Hope that he will change? Have you given up hope that there are any decent men out there, so you’re just going to settle for the best of the worst? Is there some sort of trophy for being loyal to someone who couldn’t care less if you cry yourself to sleep every night? I don’t think so. The return on your investment for supposedly helping a man become a better person will be zero. 10x out of 9 people don’t change, and if they do, it will because they want to, not because of anything you’ve done. I don’t have the energy to take on projects, and if I wanted to raise someone, I would get pregnant. Do not make yourself responsible for the growth of other people.

Your Man is Not Gucci Mane


From the outside looking in, it appears that Gucci Mane has made a miraculous transformation since being released from prison. The man is literally glowing. He and his new wife Keyshia look like they’re on cloud nine, and they had a breathtaking wedding. We do not know the details of their relationship, but they appear to be madly in love. Keyshia was Gucci’s ride or die, supporting him through prison, years of alleged drug use and a career that comes with copious amounts of glamour and temptation. They have become relationship goals for many, proving that if you stay loyal, you will be rewarded with a ring and a lavish lifestyle. Apparently women these days do not know how to hold a man down properly and leave as soon as a problem arises. We should all be more like Keyshia, right? That’s what I have been seeing so much of. Your man deserves for you to be a loyal doormat while he runs wild through the streets, and you are a bad partner if you require more of him. How dare a woman expect loyalty from her significant other?! How preposterous! That logic irks me beyond belief. Sure, there are men who put up with women who do not treat them right, but the difference lies in that this is not an expectation of men.22490034_1532633586780060_8010361249584378024_n No man is raised to “stand by your woman” no matter what she does. Have you ever watched a movie or show where a man’s peers were telling him how good of a woman his significant other is despite her constant cheating and troublesome behavior, and that he should give her a chance to change her ways? We aren’t talking about one mistake or slip up during the relationship, but an overall toxic and emotionally draining environment. Everyone is going to make mistakes, it’s human nature, but your whole relationship should not be a merry-go-round of screw ups and empty apologies. If Gucci Mane truly made a turnaround, that’s great. Apparently Keyshia saw something in him that I would not have stayed around to uncover, and we have to stop preaching this twisted rhetoric that if you allow a man to drag you through the mud long enough, you will come out clean on the other side. A relationship is not supposed to be in a perpetual state of turmoil. Romantic love is not supposed to hurt, and while it requires work like any other relationship, it should not be a constant uphill battle. This all goes back to the sect of gender roles that require women to be submissive and subservient. Many say that women will put up with anything for money, and many say that taking care of someone financially entitles them to do whatever they’d like. This is not 1888, and you don’t have to put up with anyone’s foolery in order to prevent homelessness and despair. I didn’t know that the only thing a man was supposed to do was provide financial support. It may be better to cry in a mansion, but who wants to be hurt at all? If you allow a man to disturb your inner peace just for a designer bag and some jewelry, you don’t love him, you just love the fancy lifestyle, and you certainly don’t love yourself. 

30th Times’ a Charm

“Maybe he will finally get it this time!” This is the battle cry of someone fighting to hold on to a relationship with a person who doesn’t act right and who likely never will. You lie awake at night wondering what you can try next to show him how good of a catch you are and how foolish of him it would be to let you walk out the door. You’ve seen the potential in him, and you just know that you are the one to turn this pauper into a prince. He’s shown you who he is a multitude of times, but you know that’s not the real him. He’s just been hurt by these no-good women out here. If you are taking the time to truly get to know someone, you wouldn’t be in this predicament in the first place. People are unable to hide their true colors for long, and time reveals all, but of course, women love to fall in love with potential. I’m not sure why so many of us think we have the supreme power to manifest change in people, but no one is that powerful. We do not have this level of control over anyone, and trying to control things you have no power over will lead to disappointment every time. When some people realize that actively trying to change a person doesn’t work, they try the wait and pray approach. They walk all over you again and again, but you have the patience of Job; you tell yourself this time that God is working on their heart, and if you just be still, you will come out on the other side stronger than ever. Get a grip. Your efforts are futile and you are letting the best years of your life pass you by waiting on a loser to see the light. Being in a bad relationship just for the sake of being in one is selling yourself short.

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We all know those “at least I got a man” type of women, even though their man is unemployed, unfaithful, ugly and God only knows what else. But hey, any man is better than no man, right? Internalized misogyny is a real killer. Some women are so brainwashed they feel it is better to allow emotional and sometimes physical abuse from a boyfriend or spouse than be single and date until a suitable partner is found. To make matters worse, a lot of women are allowing men they aren’t even in relationships with dog them out. They hope if they prove their loyalty to him, he will bestow the honor of being his girlfriend upon them. Countless women give their unwavering loyalty to men who would be gone at the first dose of disrespect. It is time that we become equally intolerant. Instead of building up a hopeless charity case, find someone who matches or even exceeds where you are in life. If you find that all you attract are men who have nothing to offer besides penis and a headache, it’s time you go inside and examine yourself. You clearly don’t think you deserve anything better. The universe gives us back what we put out, and it is impossible to attract something that is not present within yourself. I do not find it impressive to be the woman who finally made the most wild man of them all act right.  All that means is you were the one foolish enough to stick around long enough for him to either get tired of his current lifestyle or all his other options showed him the door and you were the only one dumb enough to still be there. You are not Cesar Milan, but instead of teaching dogs how to behave, you have a knack for training problematic men. I have yet to read any type of content regarding a man helping build a woman into the person she is meant to be, stand by your queen while she’s down, or anything pertaining to men tolerating disrespect while a woman grows and matures. This does not have to be a double standard that withstands the rest of humanity, but it will be as long as women keep buying into the notion that you should be loyal to a fault while you do not receive the same treatment in return. Love is conditional, and not everyone should be entitled to your heart.

Closure: Necessary or Overrated?

I absolutely love writing about the characters on HBO’s “Insecure.” I love discussing them. I love analyzing them. To put it simply, this show fills a TV void that I didn’t know I was missing. Sure, most adults can relate to the perils of dating and friendship drama, but as a young black woman, Insecure just hits that niche spot. It feels good to be represented on mainstream television as a black millennial, and I’m sure the men of the #LawrenceHive can agree. Throughout all 16 episodes, there have been many times where I have been Issa. I have been Molly. I have been Kelli. I have been Tiffany, who endures the “light skin” jokes. In the finale of Season 2, titled “Hella Perspective”, I am sure many of us have been Issa or Lawrence, closing a chapter with someone in which we care for deeply. Despite their ever-present love for each other, they both got the closure they needed, which will hopefully put an end to them acting out their pain in an onslaught of meaningless encounters and projections onto others.


The finale sparked some interesting conversation regarding closure, specifically whether or not it is needed to move on with your life and open your heart again. To some people, yes, it is a key part to healing and finally realizing that this is curtains closed; the ship has sailed, and you can now begin a healthy relationship with someone else. To others, however, closure is a futile attempt to gain clarity on what went wrong, and even an excuse to see the person again and drag out the ending process until there is absolutely nothing left. In a perfect world, closure sounds nice. Wouldn’t it be lovely to have a final conversation with your old boo, where both of you address where you went wrong, take the appropriate amount of responsibility, then go your separate ways with a clear conscience and no hard feelings? Ha! Too bad that rarely ever happens. Thank you Issa for putting false hope in our hearts.

You Want Answers & You Want Them Now

One of the Google definitions of ‘closure’ is “a feeling that an emotional or traumatic experience has been resolved.” We often hear of friends saying they got no closure at the dissolution of a relationship. We hear it acted out on scripted television and reality shows. Something ending abruptly or painfully often leaves us with questions unanswered, anger, confusion, etc., and by receiving “closure,” we can tie up those loose ends. We are a logical species, and being unable to understand others’ behaviors leaves us quite unsettled. This leads us to seek answers. We tell ourselves we want the truth, no matter how ugly. I can’t speak for everyone, but there hasn’t been a time where I have gone this route and received the results I so desired. It was just more of the same: pointing the finger back at me, dodging the questions, and either failing to see their part in our demise or shutting down completely. I finally realized one day that if I was not getting the communication and other things I needed while we were involved with each other, what would change in a matter of weeks? Most people don’t reach some sort of epiphany where they can wake up and realize they were a piece of sh*t and have a burning desire to own up to it all. I would leave even more angry and hurt than I was before the encounter, causing me to questions my judgment and decision making ability.giphy3 This does not mean I believe Insecure dropped the ball by allowing us to witness a healthy conversation between Issa and Lawrence where they both accepted their failures in the relationship. If anything, it should serve as an example to the rest of us. The reality is that this is the sort of closure that most of us will most likely never experience at the end of a relationship, and that does not go to say that Issa and Lawrence floated to this moment after months of soul searching. They had their fair share of drama and pain. All of this inner turmoil can manifest in a plethora of ways, like “hoe phases” and picking up random girls for threesomes at the grocery store.

Closure Puts Those Demons To Rest

Hurt people, hurt people, including themselves. While I no longer seek traditional closure at the end of my relationships, I can understand why some people feel like they need it. During a couple of therapy sessions after the end of a tumultuous relationship of my own, my therapist told me it was normal to feel the grief I was experiencing. I learned that after a bad breakup, our brains have the same or very similar reaction as when a loved one dies. We experience the same phases of grief: denial, anger, bargaining, etc. Heartbreak takes a serious toll on our mental health. Pain can manifest itself in many ways, and in Issa’s case, it came out in a self-proclaimed “Hoe Phase.” That lifestyle does not suit Issa. She isn’t cut out for it. Her “hoe-tation” left her even more unfulfilled and frustrated, and a lot of it was awkward to witness, from random romps with her neighbor to unintended facials, Issa failed at being sexually liberated. Her attempts at embracing the single life were unsuccessful because she sought empowerment in ways that were not compatible with her personality. She asked Molly to teach her how to “hoe,” without even stopping to realize that the hoe life has brought giphy4Molly nothing but pain and disappointment. Lawrence, on the other hand, used Tasha as a rebound to distract himself from the pain of betrayal, and ended up hurting and embarrassing her as he lead her on and drowned his sorrows in her vagina and home cooked meals. He then went on to have random trysts with strangers just out to use black men for their so called sexual prowess, and projected his trust issues onto Aparna, who could prove to be a promising match for him. So what did we learn at the end of the finale? Both Issa and Lawrence have gained some much needed insight on what they each could have done differently. They’ve accepted reality and the beef has been cooked up and eaten. Now they both can go out into Singleville with a clear mind and date with dignity. Closure goals, no? Unfortunately, most of our closure looks more like Issa and Lawrence’s 30 second silent romp at the beginning of the season.

Closed Relationship, Open Legs

Raise your hand if during those “lets just meet up and talk this out then go our separate ways”  discussions you did more f’ing and less talking? Or even if you didn’t end up taking an unintended dick appointment, you just opened the can of worms again and invited the drama right back into your life? I can’t lie, my hand is raised too. I was lying to myself when I was either initiating a meet-up or agreeing to one that we were just there to talk. Deep down, I just wanted to see him again. I would get cute, rehearse my speech in my head, and hope that he would either see the light or that my good looks would make him realize what he was giving up. I ended up wasting my time and he was wasting his. Sure, we were done, but after those meetings texts were still coming through, pictures still being liked, and neither of us would throw in the towel until someone else entered the pictured or it had finally run its course. I stopped torturing myself like that long ago. When a breakup is fresh, don’t tempt yourself with a meeting in which you know will put you in a vulnerable position. I have become a part of Team No Closure because unless both people walk into these encounters with honest tumblr_ow3paalzpv1txl6nno8_r1_400intentions and a clear mind, you might as well abort the mission. This is where I applaud the closure scene between Issa and Lawrence, because they took advantage of an opportunity to clear the air. While I still think these are not typical results (still possible though), it did not occur under the guise of “ay, come through we should talk” or “you left your hat here, you wanna come grab it tonight when I get off work?” It was organic. The moral of the story is, if you are out to seek closure, do so with a clear mind. Give yourself time. Give the other person time, and don’t be offended if they tell you to kick hot rocks with no shoes on. Conversations such as these should only be had when your emotions are not running high and you aren’t stuck in the past, being a professor of revisionist history. My current version of closure is learning to accept an apology that I may never receive and moving on with my life. An understanding of why you hurt me does not make the pain any less devastating, and a half-assed sorry is not a percocet for my broken heart. Most people’s egos will not allow them to become vulnerable and hold a mirror up to their wrong-doings, so I would rather not even try and end up disappointed. To each their own though, and I hope we all can seek the closure we need within ourselves.


We’re All A Little “Insecure”


SPOILER ALERT: If you are not yet caught up on the show or have not started it yet, this post contains spoilers. Everyone else, please continue 🙂

Insecure has captivated me. The release of this show just further reminded me how absent authentic Black characters are from mainstream television. It is a breath of fresh air from all of the reality shows depicting petty drama, forcing us to watch 20 year old reruns of Martin just for a little comedy. Issa Rae only served us 8 episodes of Insecure so far (thankfully, we’re getting a season 2), but she managed to develop very complex and multi-dimensional characters in such a short season. 8 episodes, 30 minutes each, and I easily feel like I thoroughly know them all. Each of the main characters are relatable in some way, and most of us have been either Issa, Molly or Lawrence at some point in our lives. One of the main themes in the show is the relationship between Issa and Lawrence. The show begins and it is the morning of her 29th birthday. While she was on Facebook looking over her “happy birthday” posts, she gets a message from a guy named Daniel wishing her a happy birthday and her face lights up like a Christmas tree. I had not yet noticed Lawrence lying in bed behind her, sound asleep. Without knowing it, we are almost immediately introduced to the temptation she will face for almost the entire season. Her lack of fulfillment is obvious. tumblr_of6io5hbnm1swms2fo4_400She often complains to her best friend Molly about how boring their relationship is and how she is exhausted from carrying the emotional and financial weight of it all. Lawrence is out of work after his app failed, and mostly sits around the house in dingy sweatpants complaining about his bad luck with interviewing. To add to Issa’s growing resentment of him, he forgets her birthday. After 5 years and no growth as a couple, she was basically over it. If you want to create a perfect recipe to push your woman to the next D, do all of the things that Lawrence was doing. Unlike men, the majority of women who may have cheated did not do so just for sh*ts and giggles. There is no thrill of the chase, no sliding in DM’s just because its Monday. Emotional needs aren’t being met. Justifying cheating is not what I’m trying to do; I’m talking about causation, not morals. How well did Issa communicate her needs and concerns to Lawrence? Not very well. She had numerous opportunities to elaborate on what she told him the night she and Molly went to the open mic. You really can’t tell someone how you don’t intend to spend the rest of your life sitting on the couch with them, leave for 2 days then come home acting like that whole conversation never happened in a matter of hours. By this point, Issa’s main concern is Issa. She has vowed to begin giving zero f*cks and to start killing it at work. She did not have much concern for strengthening her relationship, but realizes she still loves Lawrence nonetheless, so she continues going through the motions of it all. After Issa and Daniel had their almost hookup after the open mic, I figured he was pretty much out of the picture. He was completely thrown off by the word “relationship” coming out of her mouth, so I thought that was a wrap. I should  have known better, considering they chose to bring up how Issa has always had a weakness for him. Although Issa was vulnerable to cheating due to the fragile state of her relationship, I also do not fully believe she would have turned Daniel down, regardless of how things were with Lawrence. The one that got away is now back in your life and showing interest in you. You have shared history to pull from, allowing you to reconnect, and it would just feel right. She subconsciously placed herself in a compromising position, and the cheating commenced. 


Issa wasn’t the only one in the relationship faced with temptation. While she was ignoring Lawrence and complaining about his lack of a job, the bank teller Tasha was uplifting him at every turn. Pretty face, bubbling personality and boobs to die for were there waiting for him every time he went to deposit his unemployment check. She joined him for lunch, and came to his job at Best Buy showing him how good she looks when she isn’t dressed in her work clothes. Tasha was putting herself out there with no shame. No matter when or where they were interacting, Lawrence never once acted inappropriately. It was more than obvious that Tasha had an interest in him, yet he politely told her he had a girlfriend. Major respect for Lawrence. Despite his flaws, he was 100% committed to Issa. He was too comfortable in their way of life to realize that the relationship was densely clouded with communication issues. He was genuinely taken aback when Issa essentially told him that he was boring and that their relationship was boring as well. tumblr_oh0w6502ys1rxovx9o1_400She did not do him any favors by waiting until she was fed up to express any concerns. He never noticed anything to be wrong, but sometimes we cannot see past our own set of problems. Lawrence was feeling extremely discouraged after his app failed and continuously passed over for jobs after several interviews. He was watching his friends’ careers take off while he was living off unemployment checks and his dwindling savings account. As a man, his ego had taken several L’s. No one wants to fail. No man wants to put himself through college and amass all of this debt just to watch his woman take care of them both. His pride was clearly damaged when he had to go and work at Best Buy. While Issa congratulated him, Tasha from the bank acted as if he had just landed a job at NASA. Her support for Lawrence was unwavering and seemingly unconditional, so it made perfect sense that she would be the one he rebounded with after Issa crushed his soul. I was kind of curious as to when they exchanged numbers, because I would have thought that to be a very important interaction. 

Was Lawrence Wrong?

Twitter has had a very interesting reaction to the finale of Insecure, and the men and women (not surprisingly) are taking opposite sides. The men are cheering Lawrence on as if this is their version of Lemonade, and many women think he took it too far. As a reminder, while Issa was out of town for Kelli’s birthday, Lawrence calls and tells her he misses her. He wants to talk when she gets back. Issa leaves right away, with Molly eventually deciding to drive her home. She walks in and sees Lawrence’s keys on the counter and you can see the hope spark in her eye. As she walks into the bedroom, it takes a moment for her to register what she is seeing. Lawrence’s pillow is gone and so are all of his items off the nightstand. She looks over to the closet and sees that all of his clothes are gone, except for his Best Buy t-shirt. Strong statement or nah? He essentially left Issa and the old him behind, the Best Buy shirt reminding her that the growth she so desperately wanted from him will not be something she gets to experience. This is my take on Lawrence’s Revenge: he was not wrong for sleeping with Tasha. He was a single man. While him luring Issa home under the premise of having a conversation seemed harsh, I get it. He was hurt, and he knew how much it would hurt her to come home only to have her hopes painfully dashed. It was behavior I did not expect from Lawrence, especially after hearing how unimpressed he seemed hearing about his friends’ profane exploits and thoughts on Black women. By using Tasha as a rebound, he personified the lifestyle his friends were bragging about. Rebounds never work out, and now he has used someone who is genuinely interested in him just to soothe his ego and enact his revenge on Issa. But you know what they say: “hurt people, hurt people.” Lawrence is a perfect example of that.tumblr_ohd2541dd41qm5jggo1_1280 What makes Insecure such a good show is the realness of it all. He did what any man would have done. When it comes to love, sex and infidelity, people rarely take the high road. The double standard men have with cheating is that it is fine as long as they are doing the cheating. If the roles are reversed and they are the one who was cheated on, rarely are men forgiving. They have very fragile egos, and most can’t take that kind of betrayal. What Issa’s tryst with Daniel also showed us is how vilified women are if they ever make a mistake and step out of their relationship. Most of us watch Ghost cheat on Tasha every Sunday on Power, yet he does not face the same backlash. I could name countless examples. Women who cheat often face the ultimate punishment and rarely have any sympathizers. We are faced to wear some type of Scarlet Letter for eternity. For example, the character Judith in Tyler Perry’s “Temptation” was bored in a stagnant relationship and Tyler Perry decided to suddenly turn a nice, sweet woman into a drug using, disrespectful monster who ended up with HIV. The film basically told us that the moral of the story is if you cheat on your husband, the consequences are dire, if not deadly. Unfortunately, double standards are a part of the world we live in, and if Issa ever gets Lawrence back, I doubt he will ever be able to fully forgive her. She hurt him, made him feel like an idiot, and he will probably make her pay for it every chance he gets. Looks like we’ll be waiting an entire year to see what happens next.


How’s Your NFL Season Going?

Before I get deeply into this post, I am just going to say I am a Patriots fan. I love the Patriots, I have XLIX (49) tattooed above my left ankle in celebration of our Super Bowl 49 victory and if they are playing, consider me busy. I am not a journalist, so I can be as biased as I want to and freely express how I believe this is the greatest football team ever, Tom Brady is the Goat and so is the genius Bill Belichick. Yes, I receive much hate and I embrace it. I have to constantly endure all of the “cheaters” rhetoric, the Seahawks fans that I’m surrounded by in Seattle hate me (don’t be mad at me because Russell Wilson threw an interception in the endzone) and when I run into other Pats fans, we gotta high five each other. Being from tumblr_nj60yxko6g1qh3pr2o1_400North Carolina, I grew up with my family always rooting for random teams. The Panthers didn’t come to Charlotte until the late 90s, so it wasn’t odd to just pick a team and roll with them. My dad is a Raiders fan, mom Broncos, Uncle was a Cowboys fan, an Aunt was for Green Bay. By the time my sisters and I became interested in football, my dad told us that we didn’t just have to go for who he likes; my older sister decided to go with the Panthers, little sister the Colts and I went with NE (I didn’t know they were good, I swear). Anyway, those are my boys. I watch the Super Bowl where we beat Seattle all the time. It’s good TV. During the game I was flying back from Cabo. I said a prayer before we left for the airport and asked God for the W. Prayers do get answered. My friend and I were trying to stream the game on the plane without much luck, and it was while we were running to our next gate that I found out we won. Everyone started calling me like I was playing in the game or something. I felt like I should have gotten a ring too. Of course the world tried to rain on our parade with the Deflategate scandal. Will it tarnish Brady’s legacy? Maybe, but people tumblr_nj4lqcgx6s1tnx0qco1_400love to hate on the greats. I didn’t want next season to start because I was enjoying my reign as Super Bowl champs. The next season I had to watch Denver go to the Super Bowl and try not throw my TV out the window while doing so. Even still, they barely beat us in the AFC Championship with our millions of injuries. Our o line was being held together with string and scotch tape. Either way, my Pats look better than ever this season, Brady is killing it and we are on the way to doing some great things. I would like to see us converting more on 3rd down, Gostkowski needs to get his life together, and we need to ease up on the holding penalties. Sunday against the Steelers is going to rest on limiting LeVeon Bell. Can’t have them running all over us. I’m so grateful for DirecTV Sunday ticket. I can always watch my games and all the others. Can’t beat a Sunday full of football.

Everyone Else

2001There are some interesting things going on around the rest of the league. I always love to see how each new season is different than the one before it. The Panthers are on a tequila-esqe Super Bowl hangover, players are protesting police brutality, the Redskins are winning games. Even the Raiders are winning games. The Bills don’t look like a total train wreck. On the other hand, some things have stayed the same. RG111 is hurt, Tony Romo is hurt and the Browns are terrible. The Giants are still inconsistent, and it’s apparently driving Odell Beckham Jr. crazy. He’s crying, attacking nets, hugging nets, and giving every one a lot to talk about. According to him, football isn’t fun anymore. I’m sure losing isn’t fun. I bet dealing with all the politics of football isn’t fun either. You can’t celebrate, you get fined for wearing different cleats, the refs are either throwing too many flags or missing blatant calls. But we all know the Giants lowkey suck. I would be upset if I had to play on that team too. Odell barely does anything all season, then breaks out and has a stellar game last week. Because of this game, I lost in fantasy. But that’s what I like to see. Don’t allow your inner petty side to overshadow your talent. I would not want to be remembered as an over-emotional crybaby when I could be remembered as an elite wide receiver. I am curious to see where he will end up in a couple of years once he is a free agent. I don’t really see a ring in his future if he stays with the Giants. The player I am really curious to see where he will end up is Dak Prescott. Dak in tandem with Ezekial Elliott has been killing it. I still can’t dakbelieve sometimes that I am watching Dallas play. Dak’s QBR is 103.9. He completion percentage is 68.7. He broke Brady’s record of the most completions without an interception. All of these great stats, and Jerry Jones still wants to give Tony Romo the starting spot back. What is wrong with Jerry Jones!? You would think Tony Romo was his own son. I wouldn’t care if he was my son, you gotta sit down bro. Romo is ridiculously inconsistent, he’s getting old and he’s made of glass. I wouldn’t have the time to run a franchise where my quarterback gets hurt faster than some feelings. Jerry Jones needs to start looking towards the future. Cowboys fans nationwide will hate him if he messes up the good thing they have going with Dak and Zeke. Jerry will make Jason Garrett put Romo in, he’ll get knocked down and before you know it, his back has broken into a thousand pieces again. Over the past couple of days I have heard that Jerry might not put in Romo, but if it were me there would be no question about it. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t have anything against Tony Romo. If he wasn’t so delicate I think he would have been a great quarterback. He’s certainly had his moments. Romo will likely be ready to play within the next few weeks, so I can’t wait to see how this pans out.

Who Are These Minnesota Vikings?

Am I the only one still in shock over Minnesota? I mean, they’re undefeated. Out of nowhere they have an elite defense and are looking great on offense too. An offense being led by Sam Bradford. SAM BRADFORD, PEOPLE! He has a 70.4 completion percentage. Not too shabby. This is all without Adrian Peterson, might I add. A backup quarterback and running back are stomping all over the NFC North. tumblr_n6xukehrnl1qhkbk8o1_400
Green Bay is 2 games behind Minnesota. They’re barely hanging on to second place, because Detroit is gaining on them. Aaron Rodgers is out there looking rather struggly. Any one know what his problem is? I mean he’s not terrible, but he and Green Bay collectively don’t look like the Packers I know. We can also cease the talk about him being better than Brady. Whatever the reason, they’ve allowed the Vikings to take control of the division. It was like after the kicker missed that field goal in the divisional playoffs last year, they decided enough was enough. Out of the seven previous Vikings teams that started off 5-0, two went to the Super Bowl and three went to the NFC championship. Who knows whether this 2016 squad will follow in those footsteps; they can flop any time, but so far, so good. The Vikings look elite, but I certainly don’t think they’re invincible. I still think they can quite possibly lose to Dallas in December (with Dak as qb) and Green Bay will be a lot tougher the second time around just due to the fact of it being a divisional tumblr_n6tnonmakg1qhkbk8o1_400game. So much of the league sucks right now, so if the Vikings keep this up who’s to say they wont go 14-2 or 13-3. They have some really easy teams left on their schedule: the Bears, Colts, Jags…it’s really not fair. We’ll get an upset in there somewhere, I just can’t wait to see who will deliver them their first L. It’s interesting that they look much better than they did last year when Teddy Bridgewater was starting. I hated to see that he injured his knee, I really wanted to see how he was going to do this year. I’m sure Teddy feels the same way. It would suck to lose your job to Sam Bradford. But this is football, and you will get dropped faster than the Warriors blew their 3-1 lead. I truly believe that if the Pats had Brady in Week 3 we would be undefeated too, but unfortunately here we sit at 5-1. Nothing to complain about obviously. We’re still sitting at the top of the AFC. Undefeated means nothing once playoffs come. We’re not even halfway into the season. Minnesota has a lot of football left to play.

My Fantasy Nightmare

Last season, I killed it in fantasy. This season, I’m getting killed in fantasy. Life comes at you oh so fast. I think I had four different teams, and I won in them all. I felt unstoppable. I was blowing people out. I was the Patriots of each of my leagues. I was like “why do people think this is so hard?!” Well, now I know why. My fantasy this year is an absolute disaster. Out of my 3 teams, I have a winning record in one. In my family league, I am 0-6. You can just call me the Cleveland Browns. This is so upsetting. I hate losing. tumblr_nbjnuxode31qdt5vso2_r1_400
I have a great team, too. Tom Brady, Antonio Brown, Vinatieri, T.Y. Hilton, etc. yet I lose and lose. And its not that I’m getting blown out, I lose by a few points. If I was a quitter, I would just quit. Every week I feel like I am getting mentally and emotionally stomped on. I can’t stress about UW on Saturday (Go Huskies!) stress about the Pats on Sunday, and stress out about Fantasy Football the rest of the time. I consider making trades and dropping players, but for what? Everyone sucks. I might as well just keep my team that looks phenomenal on paper, even though they turn into scrubs when I really need them. I was so close to beating my brother in law last week, then the Jets play Monday night. Brandon Marshall balls out then I lose. My mood quickly changed to something resembling the Jordan crying face meme. By this point I’ve turned superstitious and believe I won’t win until the Browns win. If the Browns are destined to go 0-16, then I guess I am too. The Browns play the Jets on October 30th, so I might be able to secure my first W. This would be a great first win, because I hate the Jets. I’ll win in fantasy and real life, because a Jets loss is always a win for me. Fantasy is fun, but at the end of the day, my main concern is the Patriots and Brady knocking everyone down on his revenge tour.

Week 7 Picks

Here are my week 7 picks:


  • Packers
  • Giants
  • Chiefs
  • Colts
  • Vikings
  • Bengals
  • Lions
  • Raiders
  • Bills
  • Ravens
  • Buccaneers
  • Falcons
  • Pats
  • Seahawks
  • Broncos

Happy week 7!