We all have our opinions. Depending on the subject, we may even want to add our own 2 cents into the conversation. Well I want to add my 2 cents into why some women feel as if it is their duty to confront the other woman when they find out their boyfriend or husband is cheating. I have been on the receiving end of this, and it gets on my last nerve. It has never escalated to a physical fight (I’m wayyyy too above that) or in person encounter; just texts and/or internet messaging. The badge of a full-fledged side chick has never been a part of my wardrobe, and whenever I was involved with a man who was in a relationship, it was unbeknownst to me. This topic takes me back to high school. Whenever a girl didn’t like me, it was always because her boyfriend did. How is that my fault? HOW SWAY? Is it my fault that you chose a man with wandering eyes? I think not. Anyway, here I am, 7 years post high school graduation and every now and then I will get hit up by some random girl asking me why I am talking to her boyfriend. I don’t want your man, boo boo! I can smell your insecurity through the phone. Last time I checked, I wasn’t in a relationship with you, so who I talk to really isn’t any of your business. So you confronted him as well? Good for you! You should have if you felt he was acting inappropriately, but leave me out of it. Perhaps I ignite some of your insecurities because since your man is seeking attention from me, I must have something that you don’t have. That’s why you’re mad right? Well guess what? It’s never that deep. Men get bored and they seek out attention from whoever, depending on the timing. Or, maybe you’re just an irrational human being and take everyday conversation to mean something that it’s not. Either way, you should check yourself. Even if I did want your man or was aware of the situation, the beef that develops within your relationship is your problem and yours alone. This mentality does not apply to my family members or friends. I would first of all know their relationship status, and I have no desire to become involved their current or past flames. However, if I don’t know you from Adam, I really don’t care about your relationship. Rude? Maybe, but do I care? Nope! Have you ever considered taking some responsibility for the man you chose? If you had taken more time to learn his character you could have identified those traits that would suggest infidelity. Even though you dropped the ball, no, it is still not acceptable for him to cheat or act inappropriately. But people also shouldn’t cut you off in traffic or not say ‘thank you’ when you hold the door open for them. You can’t control others, but you can control how you choose to respond to the situation. I know that being petty is trendy now, but your pettiness might get your feelings hurt. I am not above hurting feelings to maintain my peace of mind. You take a risk every time you decide to get bold and confront someone over some foolishness. How do you know they’re not crazy? Better not risk angering a hornet’s nest. Probably one of the best reasons to take your issue to the source instead of involving people who really aren’t a factor in your problem.
Why Are You Blaming Me?
So now I just want to get to the nitty gritty of this post. If your man is stepping out, WHY ARE YOU ON MY LINE ABOUT IT?!? I am not in a relationship with the two of you. I don’t owe you any loyalty, and don’t try to throw me any bullsh*t about respecting your relationship. I do not know you, so I do not owe you any respect. If you’re married, then there is a certain level of respect people should have for your relationship, so I am not talking about that, but I have had girls come at me for men who aren’t even their boyfriend. That’s next level pathetic. You are mad at a stranger for not respecting your relationship instead of focusing your anger on the person who agreed to be loyal to you. This is like on Maury when the alleged baby father comes onto the stage with his new piece, and the baby mama decides to throw insults at her. Backwards, much? You aren’t going to leave him anyway, because if you were, you would be busy kicking him to the curb instead of trying to beef with the profile picture on my Facebook page. Why expel so much energy just to go back to him tonight? You are going to drive yourself insane trying to police his phone and social media for other women. If a woman likes his most recent photo, why are you making it your business to tell her to leave him alone? Your jealousy is going to get the best of you, and I most likely won’t be all that friendly once you contact me because now I’m annoyed. I am not responsible for the actions of your man, so you are out of line to reach out to me. What is your motive? To get me to stop talking to him? Well you’ve succeeded because no one is worth the drama, but you haven’t really won. Once he realizes I’m over it, he’ll be on to the next. In addition, if it has been nothing but innocent conversation, you’re just pushing him away by acting crazy. Men are going to have female acquaintances, co-workers, classmates, etc and you will be the one miserable in the long run because you’re psychotic. If your dude has been having a full on affair with some chick who had no idea about you, then I’m not blaming you for maybe wanting to get a little insight. This post isn’t about you. This is for the Tommie’s from Love & Hip Hop Atlanta who make it their business to eradicate any female who even looks their man (or pretend man’s) way. Maybe your relationship isn’t even really worth it if you spend your free time lurking on girls’ Instagram photos to see if he’s liked their posts and spend the rest of your time starting drama. But hey, what do I know? All I know is I would appreciate it if you weirdos would leave me alone. This hasn’t happened to me in quite awhile, but I’m sure it will again. And I will tell you what I have told the others: “I have no interest in taken men, so I would appreciate it if you would refrain from contacting me further and take this up with him; do not make your personal problems mine, thanks!” And that’s it. I’ve had them try to start arguments and that’s when I hit them with the good ol’ block. The ‘block’ feature is the best invention since caller ID. Ain’t nobody got time for that. Never in life will you get me to argue with you about some dusty dude who has clearly shown you he isn’t worth the dirt on the bottom of your shoe. I save petty arguments for the basic birds. The moral of the story is, if you find your bae in my inbox, go take it up with bae, and let me live in peace. Deal?